One month to go

PMR is coming and is going to come someday in a month. Studying really hard but needs guidance. And not to forget, prayer before studying too! Study is study, but not too serious. We need some fun and craziness around. Listen to some catchy songs. Get crazy along with our friends. Wow, I sound like a advisor or something mann...






Listen music to your heart! yea...

Getting along with my crazy friends. No matter how bad or evil they are towards others by insulting each other, I'm getting along with them and enjoying myself in school.

'murdering' a bottle

But there are times when they talk about someone I don't know or something about me behind their backs, I just ignore them and try not to think about it. I'm feeling very left out. I'm trying to be their good and best friend each day. So, all I do is, just don't talk to them about it and start talking to other friends. Whenever they ask me whether I know what they are talking, I just say, "No..." And they will be glad about it according to their expression of their faces. They just talked about me yesterday. I just kept myself quiet all the time and didn't start a conversation.

They don't even sms me but if there is something important, then they will. But other times, they don't and never ever message me. If I message them, you'll dream they'll reply me. Their excuse is - expensive lah wanna reply back. But they can reply to each other.

And whenever I bring my mobile phone or camera to school when the school allows, they would want to use it to take pictures and have fun with me. And they even read my message in my phone. But they won't let me play with their phones.

So, sometimes now, you may not see me smiling because I would flashback of what happened in my life. I will be dreaming of what if I do this, what if I do that. I'm very down when I'm flashing back to think that I am having these friends.

But no matter what, I act as if I don't know anything of what they are talking about and face the reality of it. Maybe God put me into this condition so that I will look to Him and seek Him more than normal. I am very far from Him.

Just act normally

So, all I do is to surrender everything to His hands and let Him handle my day and my life. If He ask me to end my relationship with my friends, I'll do it for my own good for He knows my future. Pray that He will change me more and more and change the hearts of my friends someday.